by Merve_a_art

Jimin didn't mutter a single word during the entire thirty-minute car ride to Joon's place. My policeman friend had the courtesy to keep the siren off, as not to startle Jimin any further. I wish I could read my brother's expression, but Jimin was in the passenger seat, and sat with slumped shoulders, making it impossible for me to see his face.

I was in the backseat, squeezed between a laundry basket filled with Joon's smelly clothes and a dog carrier. There were two Bangtan Bars on my lap, but Jimin hadn't shown any interest in them. Although, I supposed, chocolate would probably be the best cure for him right now. 

I bit my lip. The only other time Jimin had actually refused chocolate was when he ended up having a feeding tube inserted into his stomach. The very same feeding tube, he was scheduled to have removed on 10th October, only two weeks from now. 

Perhaps I should move that appointment to a later date…just in case. 

When we got out of the car, we were immediately greeted by the loud barking of an over-sized dog. Rapmonster (who names their dog like that and can even remember it?) was just as boisterous as I recalled. 

"Gosh, I haven't seen that fluff ball in over a year."

"He hasn't changed much. Other than that he's no longer a fluff ball. Summer had been so hot that I gave him a buzz cut."

"I bet he looks ridiculous."

Joon scratched his head. "He did, to be honest. But it started to grow back a little. He's actually rather cool looking like this."

"I wonder how Jimin will react. He always loved animals."

We both turned to stare at my brother, only to notice that he hadn't even moved a single muscle. He was still buckled into the passenger seat, eyes directed forward, but unseeing. They were glossed over, hazed…defeated. 

I had to gulp audibly as I opened the door with as little noise as possible, and leaned over to unfasten his seatbelt, "come on, Jiminie." I carefully guided him forward, and he followed like a puppet. I could be anyone, leading him anywhere. And he would have complied just the same. 

My eyes started to sting a little. 

Joon's mouth twitched, as if he too didn't know what to say or do, and I thought I saw him wiping a tear as well. I was oddly touched to see him caring so much about my brother. I clapped his shoulder hoping he recognised it for the gratitude it was supposed to express. I didn't trust my voice right now.

The door opened, and about thirty kilos of snow-white, hyperactive dog jumped into Joon's arms. "Get down, you crazy dolt!" Joon laughed while trying to push his companion to the ground. Rapmonster (poor doggie) had other ideas. He circled Joon, then jumped him from behind, happily waggling his tail and barking. "Down! You bag of fleas!"

A soft giggling sounded behind me, but it wasn't only my attention that got drawn to Jimin. In the span of probably no more than a millisecond, Rapmonster had detangled himself from Joon's grip, and was now sitting atop of Jimin—who had tumbled to the ground, waggling his tail and licking his face. 

As much as I loved dogs and Rapmonster in particular, I was preparing myself to kick the beast to the moon. But just as I lifted my leg I could hear some loud guffaws from somewhere below the oversized ball of fur. Jimin was laughing his lungs out. Now that Rapmonster had shifted slightly, I could see my brother's face and the utter delight displayed on it. 

"Rapmonster is quite good at reading people," Joon sounded like a proud dad. 

"I was scared there for a second." I admitted. "I would have fought that beast."

"I know you would. But hyung, I wouldn't have offered you and Jimin to stay the night if I didn't trust my dog's behaviour." 

"I know, I know… but you're not the only one who's allowed to act like an overprotective parent here."

"No, I guess not." Joon turned to Jimin and Rapmonster. "First one inside gets a treat."

When I returned from a well-needed shower I found Jimin and Rapmonster squeezed into Joon's tiny living room. One was merrily chewing on a piece of bone, while the other spotted a chocolate mouth, nose, and ears. I didn't know which one to hug first. 

I perched myself onto the threadbare couch next to my brother, wrapping my arms around him. 

"I love you, Jimin. So, so much."

"Can I have another chocolate bar?"

I guess that was my brother's way of returning the sentiment. "Not tonight. But I brought one for tomorrow morning for you." I glanced at the clock. It was already three am. Theoretically, it was already tomorrow morning, and for once I was glad Jimin had difficulties reading the clock. 

Jimin looked at his hands, at Rapmonster, then finally at me. His lip started to quiver, and he opened and closed his mouth a few times. 

"What is it, Jimin?"

"I live here now?" 

My heart dropped down to my feet at once. Fuck! Did he think I was abandoning him again? That he was being shoved aside? Before I found my voice to answer, Jimin continued. "I lived in prison yesterday. I'm bad guy now."

"You're not a bad guy. Mr Yu, Mr Weselsky and those police officers are a bunch of motherfu…"

"WHAT YOONGI IS TRYing to say," Joon interrupted, now clad in a pair of Sesame Street pyjamas that I swear I would tease him for at another time. "You shouldn't have been arrested last night. What they did to you was wrong, Jimin. Yoongi and I are very upset about this."

Jimin furrowed his brows, nodding along as he took the information. He contemplated for a moment, then lifted his head towards Joon, "you go and shoot them now?"

"What's with you and shooting people?"

"They're bad guys. Bad guys need shooting."

"Bad guys need to be put in prison cells."

"And then, shooting!" Jimin crossed his arms, and tilted his head. 

"We're not shooting anyone," Joon told him.

"But you have a gun."

"Which is locked inside a safe at work, fortunately." Joon mumbled in my ear. "Your brother has a savage streak if he wants to."

I slapped Jimin's thigh. "We're staying the night at Joon's."

"And Raymond?"

"Raymond?"

Jimin pointed at the now drowsy-looking dog at his feet. "Raymond."

"Rapmonster is living here, too," Joon confirmed, while I couldn't help but think that Raymond was indeed a much more fortunate name for the poor animal. 

"I wanna sleep with Raymond." 

I was sure Jimin hadn't meant anything other by the statement than that he wanted to—for some unexplainable reasons— sleep in Rapmonster's basket, but I couldn't help laughing my lungs out at his comment. Even Joon joined in and we were giggling and guffawing, while Jimin turned to look from one to the other with a confused expression on his face. 

That's how we eventually ended up spending the night. Joon and I perched together on the tiny two-seater couch, Jimin and Rapmonster, cuddled together on the floor, sharing a blanket. Other than waking up with a nasty kink in my shoulder, it hadn't been a bad rest at all. But then I guess, after last night's adventures I would have been able to fall asleep anywhere and everywhere. 

Joon must have been awake already, as smells of freshly cooked breakfast wafted from the kitchen. I opened and closed my eyes. Joon really wasn't the best cook in the world, but the flavours were rather…pungent. I got up and almost tumbled over the dog-basket on the floor and rushed to the kitchen. Between the two of them, Jimin and Joon had managed to burn rice to charcoal. Some sorry-looking brownish water waited in the coffee pot for someone to have mercy and throw it out. 

"Hyung!" Both cried at the same time. 

I wouldn't say I was a great chef, but at least I knew my basics. "Why don't the two of you fuck off, and let me take care of breakfast."

Joon turned to Jimin. "We could take Rapmonster for a walk."

Jimin didn't need to be asked twice. Faster than the Flash he stood next to the door, impatiently rattling the knob. "Come on, Joonie, come!"

"How about you put on some shoes and a jacket first?" I called before I realised that this was how we had collected him from the station last night. 

"Maybe he can borrow yours for the time being?" Joon suggested. 

"I didn't bring a jacket myself."

"I can lend Jimin a coat. I meant your shoes."

"Excuse me, but have you seen Jimin's feet?" 

We all stared at the stripy-socked boats at the end of my brother's legs. "They are enormous. He's two sizes larger than me."

Jimin lifted one foot as if to inspect it from a closer distance. "Smelly," he remarked, then put it back down. 

"Alright then. Let's see if one of my pairs will fit." Joon brought a pair of green trainers and Jimin slipped inside. "I like," he grinned. "We go now?"

While Joon's shoes seemed to be a perfect match, his coat hung on Jimin like a rag, but my brother didn't seem to mind. He was too engulfed in the idea of potentially walking a dog. As soon as Joon opened the safety lock, Jimin and Rapmonster were outside, swiftly disappearing around a corner. 

"You better hurry," I told Joon who was busy fighting his shoelaces. 

"Jimin! Rapmon! Wait!" He called, then ran after them, and forgot to close the door in his wake. 

I grinned. I had missed this Joon. The clumsy goof who wasn't able to coordinate his own morning routine without at least five incidents. It was a massive relief to see him like that after months and months of him being the steady rock to my incapable arse.

Humming to myself, I prepared a new batch of coffee and started to cook a fresh serving of rice. Just as I was done slicing up some veggies my phone started to ring. I furrowed my brow, then looked at the clock. Not even eight yet—no wonder I felt tired. Who the fuck was calling me that early?

"This better be important," I barked into the receiver. 

"I believe it is, Mr Min." Mr Yu sounded unperturbed by my less than friendly greeting. "I spoke to several tenants today, and there were various complaints. I believe it best if you and that brother of yours moved out." 

"I guess that's the first time we agree on something. I'm sick of that shithole. I'll come by in the afternoon to collect my stuff." I ended the call and aimed for the couch, but missed it by an inch or so. The phone landed in the dog basket instead. 

Great. Now, I wasn't only unemployed, I was also homeless. It probably wasn't a coincidence that I befriended the dude from the shelter last night, Bim or Bam, or whatever his name was. What the fuck wasn't going wrong in my life right now?

I wondered for how long Joon would be happy to put up with us. This flat, although slightly bigger than mine, wasn't any more adequate for three people than my own crib. Or rather the no-longer-my crib. His bedroom was just big enough to cram in a single bed, and his living room held a two seater sofa, which filled up most of the space. The kitchen was a nook that buckled under a fridge, a washing machine, and a stove which all could be operated without having to move. Biting my lip, I tried my parents' home number again. Tried the mobile again. There wasn't even any more space to leave another message. 

I eyed the sleek, black device Joon had left behind when they went for a walk, and I wondered whether my friend was still using the same passcode. 

Worth a try, I supposed, and found myself in luck for the first time in days. 

With slightly shaking fingers I punched in a number, only to see whether my suspicion would be confirmed. Part of me hoped I was wrong for once, while the other part wasn't all too surprised when mum's mobile started to ring. So it had really been only my number that was blocked. 

"Hello? Who is this?" Mum chirped into the receiver. 

At least I could stop worrying about them now, and save myself a trip to another precinct to file a missing person report. "I suppose I'm no one, so I will stop bugging you. Hope you have a miserable life and painful death. Fuck you."

That phone, too, went flying through the room, and ended up in the dog's basket. I bit my lip. The urge to hit something or someone was back. My parents and I weren't close. We didn't like another at the best of times. But fuck! This hurt nevertheless. 

I guess I finally understood how Shop-dude must have felt when he had walked into that empty apartment one day, and found his family gone. Metaphorically at least, I had just experienced the same thing. 

And yes. One couldn't help but start to question themselves. 

I scanned the room for Joon's police jacket, hoping to find a pack of cigarettes in there, but I was out of luck. Instead, I found two bottles of soju and a half-full bottle of whiskey. Who said eight am wasn't a good time to get completely shitfaced? 

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