| Hi read, How are you? How is your week going?
How is it almost Thanksgiving!?! I don't know about you, but October was stuffed with too many things. With Thanksgiving and the holidays fast approaching, I wanted to share some thoughts on how to create a more intentional experience this holiday season.
One of the things the pandemic helped our family with was to simplify. For years, we would travel several hours to our family ranch to spend time with our extended family on Thanksgiving. While it was fun for our boys, preparing a meal in a small kitchen wasn't fun for my husband and me. So, during the pandemic, we stopped going and started hosting a much smaller group in our home. For now, we're good with this new version of Thanksgiving.
So, what can you do to change what the holidays look like?
Consider what you want the holidays to look like. Do you want to simplify? Do you want to bake in downtime so your family can recoup and recharge over the holidays? Can you do a road trip to a nearby spot you've been wanting to experience? Do you have budget to outsource something to allow yourself to be more present (e.g., gift wrap service)?
Say no without saying no. My no was saying "I can't do the full Thanksgiving at the ranch but I can do this" (prepare a meal at our home and eat outside). I never actually said no. We shared what we could do and asked family members to join us in our new approach to Thanksgiving. For those who didn't want to join us, we didn't pressure them or feel offended.
Shift your mindset. Step away from the could haves, should haves, and what ifs this holiday. No mom guilt needed right now. Create the experience you want and be intentional with your time, effort, and money. You'll be surprised by the weight that is lifted from your shoulders and how it helps with your own mental health and stress level. And don't let social media make you think you're doing it wrong.
Decide if it's time for new traditions. In the past when we were with my extended family, we would have a ridiculous amount of desserts on Thanksgiving. This year I think we're going to do ice cream sundaes. Why? Because they make my boys smile from ear to ear, so why not create more of that feeling. Maybe you don't travel for 6 hours each way from now on. Or maybe you simplify and picnic outside if the weather is nice. Can you do one Secret Santa this year instead of buying presents for everyone with costs skyrocketing? Keep what you love and get rid of the rest.
Prepare for the tough conversations. You might be dealing with hurt feelings or have people who don't want to let go of old traditions. Focus on facts (e.g., coronavirus and flu cases in your area, costs for plane tickets have increased, etc.). Don't try to take away someone's disappointment. how empathy, but do show empathy. Consider taking a moment to Zoom on Thanksgiving or to open gifts. Send a dessert or part of a meal when you can't be there in person to be there in spirit.
Feel empowered to create a new version of the holidays. You'll be thankful you did! I'd love to know how it goes if you want to share.
Have a great start to your holiday season,
SB
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