I hadn't seen Paula in six years. How did we go that long after years of spending so much time together? She and her husband, David had been my friends since I met them at Evergreen Church when my sons were in high school. They helped with the youth group and David was also one of their Boy Scout leaders. Paula and David had come to our home for many family dinners, including Christmas Eves following our church service.
Though Paula is fifteen years younger than me, I felt we were kindred spirits. We shared many interests, including the love of being in nature. She and David had always been drawn to the mountains and eventually they built a home there. Since I last saw her in August of 2017, a lot has happened. They have transitioned to living up there full-time and I've gone through a divorce and two moves. We all went through that "Covid period" when we were isolated and lost track of time. With those six years, it's no wonder our friendship has been continued virtually versus in person.
When I shared my desire to walk the Camino, my plan for training on the trails, Paula reached out to me. She hikes often and named several that would increase my distance and be a challenge with the up-and-down mountain paths. It was the perfect time to see my friend and to be in the fall beauty of the Smoky Mountains of North Carolina. Last Wednesday, I drove the three hours west and felt that familiar anticipation that accompanies driving on I-40, heading to a fun and relaxing destination. This time, it was even more so, knowing I'd get to catch up with my friend.
The mountains were beyond the fall peak of color but still had sections that were vivid reds, golds, and in-between. With many leaves off the trees, you could see the form of the mountain underneath, their gray-brown silhouette agains a backdrop of azure sky. Just being in that change in landscape, from the minimal hills of the Piedmont where I live, helped to transport me from my everyday. How good it was to be greeted by Paula, along with her two dogs-- Dash and Reesey, and later David in their beautiful mountain home--a retreat for me 🙂
On Thursday morning, Paula and I headed out. When I visited her in 2017, we had hiked a trail that ended in a great surprise for me when we came upon Bluff's Lodge in Doughton Park. I had stayed at that lodge in 2000 with my friend, Delores and her mother and mother's friend. It was a memorable trip because it was the first time I'd gotten out while going through chemotherapy for breast cancer. I was sad to see the lodge was no longer in operation. I remembered how we'd had such a fun time, laughing like four schoolgirls when I came out of my wig and showed off my bald head. Being with those supportive women, sitting out in the early morning fog in front of the cabin and feeling God's cloak of comfort, had been exactly what I needed.
Paula remembered how much I'd loved returning to that area and chose for us to hike Bluff Mountain Trail. With our backpacks filled with water bottles, a packed lunch of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, and our hiking poles, we took off. The weather was perfect, and hot for November at 72 degrees. The trail offered a variety of open vistas and then the cool of shaded forests. Paula has learned the native plants and we'd stop along the path for her to point out those that had faded away and those that were still in bloom, like this lovely aster.
We talked about old times and new times, about memories of activities at Evergreen Church. She has been so supportive of me over the years, and has been a confidante in the tough times of my marriage and eventual divorce. Ironically, she had worked with my boyfriend, John many years ago, both of them social workers employed for Wake County in Child Protective Services. When she first learned about me dating him, she referred to him as a "Good Guy," and her judgement of that man I'd met on eHarmony was reassuring.
Our lives have taken different paths; Paula is in a more isolated area and spends lots of time with her dogs and hiking buddies exploring many of the mountain trails. She is an artist--- expressing the beauty around her in photos and accompanying poems, both on Facebook and Instagram. She's a voracious and broad reader--- and shared with me the areas of her interests that are undiscovered by me. I can see her growth over the past six years, how she's become more of her true self. And she's encouraged that in me, as we've discussed the ways we have to find our unique path, pushing beyond the limits we'd felt comfortable with at earlier stages.
We stopped for lunch about mid-way on what ended up being a 6.5 mile hike. The hiking poles had helped with the tricky areas of rocks and roots; I remembered the REI staff member's instructions on how to get the most support from them; I started seeing them like companions for the journey. How good it felt to rest and eat the PBJ sandwiches, apple slices and cheese, looking out over the valley. While we'd just walked that one day, on that one trail, I could imagine that months from now, I would be able to walk the Camino.
On the final leg of the Bluff Mountain Trail, we were quiet and I felt the peacefulness of walking--the sound of our feet on the leaves, the occasional breeze that cooled my face, the relief of water to quench my thirst when we stopped after an incline. I thought back over the years since I first discovered this special place in Doughton Park with Delores; all the faithfulness of friends and family who helped me through those tough days of cancer treatment; all the years of raising our boys with the help of Paula and David as mentors-- like the special Aunt and Uncle that aren't charged with parenting; all the years of solo journeys, writing, and dancing that helped me find my true self; the blessing of a friend who knew my someone special before I knew him.
Altogether, I feel deeply thankful for the years and my friendship with Paula that has continued over time, over the distance--Piedmont to Mountains, over different worlds of Paula in nature's quiet and me in nights of dancing and dating. Ours is a Soulful Friendship that will grow over time.
And when spring comes round again, I hope to return with Paula to Bluff Mountain and see the flowers in bloom and once again revel in the sweetness of our friendship.
No comments:
Post a Comment