I feel like a horse that was ridden hard and put away wet. The past couple of nights have been anything but restful. Both represent a contradiction in what I wanted. One related to anxiety and dread of an experience. The other was a sense of remorse that the experience did not happen.
I left home yesterday morning for a ragtop-down ride into Austin, even though it was cool. As luck would have it, twenty minutes later, I drove into a light mist that stayed with me into Austin. The inside of my car never got wet, but I needed windshield wipers.
I left home in time to get to my doctor's office for an unpleasant procedure about 30 minutes early. According to the calendar on my phone, I needed to be at the doctor's office at 10:30. I was scheduled for a procedure to examine the inside my bladder. It is the only way to ascertain that I am still cancer free.
Four months earlier, during the same kind of procedure, a new tumor was found. My doctor opted to obliterate it in the office rather than wait for surgery in the hospital. A shot of whiskey and a short stick to bite on might have made it easier. How's that sticking with the horse story?
As I pulled into the parking garage at 10:03, I received a call from my doctor's office. They called to say that I missed my 9:45 a.m. appointment and that I needed to reschedule. I had just driven an hour and a half, and I did not plan to be summarily dismissed. I wanted/needed the assurance that I am still cancer free. According to my calendar I was early for the appointment.
A couple or three minutes later, the receptionist affirmed that I would have to re-schedule. The next available appointment wasn't until December 19th. A number of questions filled me head.
How could I have messed up my calendar? I was in a state of disbelief.
I repeated to the receptionist that my calendar indicated the appointment was not until 10:30. She countered that they had sent more than one reminder of the appointment, and I had no excuse for not knowing the correct time.
What I was hearing made no sense to me. How could my appointment be cancelled for being 20 minutes late? It was only 10:00 in the morning. Besides that, I seldom see my doctor with less than a 20-minute wait after I arrive?
It seemed futile that I could convince the receptionist otherwise. I did an about face and walked back out the door. I did express that I was not happy about the circumstances, but I did not say some other things I needed to verbalize.
I admit it. It's true that I did not read the appointment reminders. I didn't read the appointment reminders because I had not forgotten the appointment!
Reportedly, bladder cancer often comes back. As I said, at my last cystoscopy four months ago, another tumor was detected. I didn't want to wait another month to have the assurance that I am still cancer free.
Last night, as I looked through my billfold, I found the appointment card for yesterday's appointment. The appointment was set for 10:45 on November 16th. It was then that I connected the dots and remembered what had taken place. I had an appointment in that office on November 2. Noting that I had failed to include the appointment time on my calendar two weeks later, I asked for the time. I was provided the appointment card that showed 10:45 as the appointment time.
Whether I can persuade the doctor's office to work me in for another appointment before December 19th, I don't know. I am between a rock and a hard place. I have the highest level of respect for my doctor. As a physician, he represents the best. I've been a patient for years. Frankly, I'd be surprised if he was aware that I was turned away at the door.
All My Best,
Don
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