I didn't write for a few days because I was in a mood and editing my book. Actually, my mood and editing were not connected. As a woman who does every single thing for every member of this family, I was angry. I was an only child for a decade, and during my formative years I grew in a house full of adults. It is not that I mind doing for others, it is the EXPECTATION. An example would be my husband holding his plate to take, it irriatates me and HE knows it.
I have always found solace in things, books, and special drinks. It has gotten to the point where I have nothing of my own with the exception of my writing. My husband seems to take over anything that I get for myself. Three examples: my Adulting is Hard cup, my cosmo drink mix, and froth for coffee. Relaxing with an icy a cosomo mocktail, a frothy once in a while cup of coffee, not everyday, and taking over the adulting cup.
I went to bed at 8 p.m. last night. I had enough of a mouthy teenage boy. An impatient husband that wanted our son to get out and help with his truck repair. A repair that could have been done over the weekend. But, of course there was football. My husband has a way of annoying people by doing passive aggressive things. The children had a long test over Greek Mythology. My husband put the coveralls on the counter and kept interrupting class with remarks. Our neighbors are motorheads and were gunning all the engines. I despise unnecessary noise. Their dog barked all day and into the night. In short, I had enough of that day and wanted another one.
I made leftovers for dinner and cleaned up the kitchen. I showered and went to bed. The neighbors were still playing with their motor toys and I needed to put my white noise machine on to drown them out along with my Mp3 player in. I fell alseep with my audiobook New York. I didn't work out today. I am still in a mood. I made Kerig coffee while I taught classes to the children. My husband gets up cheerful and makes the coffee for himself along with froth. That really bugged me this morning, both the cheerfulness and the froth. He knew I was angry last night and well, damn, the frother was meant for ME. It was not meant to be a morning thing. I am a sensory self-soother, I like icey mockcocktail drinks in the solitude of a good movie or book. It is okay to have solitary moments when you are married. There are even times, you wake up on the wrong side of the bed.
Mid-morning, I made my point, I was a faster reader than my husband. He has been reading the book The Wager: A Tale of Shipwreck, Mutiny and Murder. I made a point to read the entire book (I was up early)this morning and made sure to recount the entire book to him. He protested that was mine. I stared at him with that was my point. I do have a way of making my point. My neighbors were greeted with loud rap music at 4 a.m. from the speaker on our gate this morning. I always have said this revenge is best served cold and well-seasoned. They called me and I told that the noise from their snowmobiles, gunning their trucks, anf their dog was too much for me. I shouldn't be able to hear your noise and conversations through closed windows, my mp3 on high, and the white nosie machine.
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