It is difficult to believe, but it has been over seven years since I retired from Children at Heart Ministries. For the last seven years I worked there, I had responsibilities for four residential programs for children and families from hard places, The story I want to share took place toward the end of that time.
I received an email from a man I didn't know. He was a man of few words. He didn't include a lot of information about himself. Yet, he shared enough information that I found his situation concerning. I wanted to offer a word of encouragement. Even though this man was mostly a mystery, his needs were real. His circumstances tugged at my heartstrings. He also was a man of wisdom.
His communication was brief: "I've lost my wife. I've lost my job. I want to be a good father to my children. Could you share Scriptures with me that could help?" Those few words and his name were mostly the only information he shared.
Honestly, I don't remember the order in which he chronicled his losses. I'm not sure it really matters. It doesn't really matter if the loss of his job or the loss of the wife came first. Both represent overwhelming circumstances. It also doesn't matter which was most disturbing to him. Both represent heartache and disappointment.
He mentioned wanting to be a good father for his children. That, too, tugged at my heartstrings. Children need both parents. I assumed that the man's children were probably with their mother, maybe not. Regardless of their location, they needed his support, his encouragement, his love and his presence.
In responding to his email, I wanted to provide what he'd requested. I pulled together some Scriptures I thought would be helpful. Before I shared the Scriptures, I stated that I often look to the Psalmist when I'm in the midst of difficulty and hardship.
David is such a good role model. Often in his life he faced overwhelming circumstances that were life threatening. Yet in each of the hardships and difficulties he faced, as he made his petitions before God, the awareness of God's presence altered his perception of the threat of the circumstances he faced. It carries with it the ring of truth, "If God be with us, who can stand against us?" Romans 8:31
We find these words in the 27th Psalm: The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life; of whom shall I be afraid? For he will hide me in his shelter in the day of trouble; he will conceal me under the cover of his tent; he will lift me high upon a rock. And now my head shall be lifted up above my enemies all around me, and I will offer in his tent sacrifices with shouts of joy; I will sing and make melody to the Lord.
Let me remind you that God always meets us at the point of need. The common denominator we all share is that we need the Lord. In Matthew 11:28-30 we have this promise from Christ: "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
It is expressed this way in the English Standard Version: "These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world."
Isn't fear one of the common denominators that we all face? How would you describe fear? Fear is a common experience where we feel unsafe or threated. I know people who will tell you, "I'm not afraid of anything".
On the other end of the spectrum, during the pandemic there were folks who traveled with their purse filled with hand sanitizer, Lysol wipes, and assortment of face masks. Why they stockpiled them was beyond my comprehension, because they didn't normally go anywhere. They collected all of that "just in case". If they found the need to leave the safety of their home, they presented themselves with a posture the puts the other person on notice: "Don't come near me".
Fear is an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat". Like the airbag system in your car, God designed a threat alert system in our brains to help with fear. Everyone comes equipped with one and different things can active it.
It is not uncommon for very small children to be afraid of the dark. Without a nightlight to calm their fears, they may not go to sleep. The psalmist said, "Jehovah is my light. " The truth of the matter is that sometimes things go bump in the dark.
A common fear that many face is the fear of public speaking. After years of public speaking, I still always have butterflies, particularly if the audience is made up of people that I do not know.
Under a cloak of transparency, my fear of snakes can make me irrational. Years ago, when my adolescent age daughter came home from church camp, she asked permission to spend the night with a friend who had also been to church camp. For whatever reason, before she left the house, she placed a rubber snake under the pillows on our bed. I went to bed first, saw the snake and the" fight or flight" syndrome was fully activated.
My paternal grandfather's walking cane was resting in the corner of two walls in our bedroom. I retrieved the cane and beat the rubber snake into smithereens. It was a good thing my daughter was not home; she might have been next.
I love the affirmation: "For in the day of trouble, he will keep me safe in his dwelling…" What greater promise do we need than the assurance that nothing touches our life, without also touching God's. Elsewhere the psalmist wrote: "Yea though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil for thou aren't with me."
In 2 Kings 6:16, we find these words: "Don't be afraid," the prophet answered. "Those who are with us are more than those with them.
How many people do you know who are terrified by what's happening in our world today? The man who prophesied the financial crash in 2008, is now saying we are on the brink of a more serious crisis.
I attempt not to discuss politics in my writing, but I have anxiety about the upcoming election. Will it serve as a catalyst for folks to go haywire and march in the streets, loot stores and do inordinate damage and promote violence?
In addition to including Scriptures in my email response to the man who asked me to send him Scriptures, I also offered to personally visit with him if he was in the area or to have telephone contact with him if he'd like to talk. He did not respond.
How would you have answered the man's request? What would you have shared? What information do you have based on personal experience, to offer as a frame of reference that we have a God who stands with us in times of difficulty?
I can only imagine the disappointment and heartache associated with the dissolution of a marriage. Like I inferred earlier, I spent a lifetime working with children and families from hard places. Fractured family living is an uphill climb. Divorce can also be the catalyst for either the husband or wife to marginally have a level of income to cover their living expenses and those of their family.
There is a lot of truth reflected in Toby Keith's song, "Who's that man?" It includes the lyrics: "Fight the tears back with a smile - Stop and look for a little while - Oh it's plain to see - The only thing missing is me - That's my house and that's my car - That's my dog in my backyard - There's the window to the room -Where she lays her pretty head - I planted that tree out by the fence - Not long after we moved in -That's my kids and that's my wife - Who's that man, running my life?..."
I don't have any first-hand knowledge related to divorce or fractured family living, but I do know what it's like to be out of work. I quit a job once because it was making me crazy and every administer who'd work there in the previous 30 years eventually was separated from employment at the board's request. Had I stayed, no doubt that would be my story as well. The General will tell you that I like to do it my way. I left under my terms, not theirs. – Regardless unemployed is still unemployed.
A couple of weeks later, I subsequently took a job making a fraction of what I'd previously made. Actually, I took another part time job as well. We made it okay, but it was tight.
I mentioned earlier that the man asking for my assistance was also a man of wisdom. How did I know that? He was a man of wisdom because he had the insight to know he needed something beyond human instrumentality. He needed a word from God.
When I finished typing out the Scriptures that I chose to send to the man, I felt nourished and rejuvenated myself. I didn't even know that I needed what this man knew that he needed, but I did.
So, what Scriptures did I send the man who asked for my help?
• The LORD is with me; I will not be afraid. What can mere mortals do to me? (Psalm 118:6"
• "God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble." (Psalm 46:1)
• "It is God who arms me with strength and makes my way perfect. He makes my feet like the feet of a deer; he enables me to stand on the heights. He trains my hands for battle; my arms can bend a bow of bronze. You give me your shield of victory, and your right hand sustains me; you stoop down to make me great. You broaden the path beneath me, so that my ankles do not turn."(Psalm 18: 32-36)
• "Great peace have those who love your law, and nothing can make them stumble." (Psalm 119:165)
• "Lord, you have assigned me my portion and my cup; you have made my lot secure. The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance. I will praise the Lord, who counsels me; even at night my heart instructs me. I have set the Lord always before me. Because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken." (Psalm 16:5-8)
• "The Lord gives his people strength. The Lord blesses them with peace."( Psalm 29:11)
• "The Lord is my light and my salvation – whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life – of whom shall I be afraid?" (Psalm 27:1)
• "Cast your burden on the Lord, and he shall sustain you: he shall never suffer the righteous to be moved." (Psalms 55:22)
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I recently read something written by John Ortberg that resonated with my spirit. He said this: "A soul disconnected from its center is like an unplugged computer. It is like a fish left on the banks of a river that would give it life. Eventually it crashes. It dies. The soul cannot be center without God.
The Psalmist sharing his experience in Psalm 27, didn't face imaginary fears. His problem was real, hostile, enemies who both with their words and their weapons wanted to destroy him. Yet, God met him at the point of need.
I don't recall where I read it, but I'm indebted to the person who made this observation:
"If we were to name our fears, they would be as personal as each of us individually. But out of Psalm 27 there is this promise: You can face your fear when you have a personal faith and when one thing dominates your life".
The Psalmist did not even begin by naming his fear. He might have begun by saying when I am afraid, I seek Jehovah. But no, the first word of the Psalm is the name of God himself, Jehovah.
First, he affirmed the name of God. And immediately, having done that, his fear was demoted. Do you recognize that this is just as real as waking up in the morning; just as practical as getting out of bed.
What is the first thing that comes in your mind when you wake up?
• It will either be something that has to do with faith or something that has to do with fear.
• It will either be something that has to do with trust or something that has to do with mistrust.
• It will either be an affirmation of belief, or it will either be the tyranny of unbelief.
The Psalmist made certain that the first conscious thought when he awakened in the morning was the name of God. And automatically. When faith was first, fear was demoted."
All My Best!
Don
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