so my mom was put inpatient at the hospital with a pulmonary embolism ... She's been there since Wednesday and will likely have to stay for a week. Visitors are not allowed because of the whole COVID thing ... But maybe she can come downstairs for a little while at some point in the next few days to see me. That would be good. I just wanna make sure she's okay...

She's had this before, about ten years ago. Was also in the hospital then (well, obviously) ... So I am breathing through this ... it sucks though that I can't just go and see her. I collected a bag of her stuff for her on Wednesday and had to hand it to the securities to take it up to her room because I wasn't allowed in. This sucks...

So, as a friend remarked, this is my third thing: First the worry about my boyfriend's asylum. Then Winnie died. And now my mom's sick and I'm worried about her. If we can trust the Trinity of Bad Things then this is it. The world should look a lot brighter soon.

I still have to go to the vet to get a paper that Winnie died, because I need to de-register him from the town I live in and I can only do that with that paper. It's annoying as hell. But I need to go to the vet in the next couple of days anyway because I need meds for my girls.

I am overwhelmed to be honest. I also got the volunteer job with the Native American thing here. They don't meet in person currently though, so I met some of them on a zoom call on Monday. It's cool and all and a fun opportunity, I just wish it had come at a different time. I am supposed to help post things to facebook and write a blog post or article about something ... but right now I can't focus on anything. It took me three hours today just to work through their list of facebook pages that might be interesting and read up a bit about what's going on over there in the States...

Sigh. Things never happen "at the right time" because, I believe, there is no "right time"... So I will have to run with whatever it is life hands me and when it hands it to me. I am just trying to stay brave in all of this and encouraged and not give up.

My boyfriend's away celebrating his new asylum status with some friends and I am tired. So tired. I should have spent the afternoon napping but I couldn't. My head is running in crazy circles. So instead I spent my time watching Sex Education. I am up until the last episode, which I haven't watched yet. I might do that while waiting for the boyfriend to come back home to me. At least I hope he'll come back tonight ... who knows. Maybe they had a drink to celebrate ... I don't know if his friends drink or not. But if he did it might be better he spends the night at his friend's apartment ... the smell of alcohol on loved ones still triggers the hell out of me ...

Ah, it's silly to worry about this. We'll see. I am sure he'll text me back soon and let me know what his plans are ...

Ok. Enough of that.

I need to walk the dogs. They deserve a proper walk. One that we couldn't do this afternoon because it was pouring outside when I walked them ... Ick!

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