by mang_a_art

Spoken to the boss. Arranged for a hotel for the next 14 days. Sorry. But no way I can afford to quarantine right now. Joon's text was to the point. Apparently, Jimin and I would have his place and his dog for ourselves for the next two weeks. Ms Kim would drop off some shopping and would meet Rapmonster at the door to take him for his midday walk, but other than that it was me and my brother, locked inside the house. 

Jimin's test had come back positive, wheres mine was inconclusive, whatever that meant. Technically, Joon too was supposed to get tested, but instead lied that he hadn't been home for the last couple of days, and his commander has shoved him into a hotel near the docks. Traitor. 

This had been three days ago. I hadn't heard from him since. 

"Hyungie?" Came a croaky voice from Joon's bed. 

"What's up buddy? How you holding up?" I felt Jimin's forehead which was still burning hot. 

"Headache," he groaned. 

"I know," I kept my cold fingers on Jimin's forehead for a moment longer. So far, no painkiller seemed to help with the headache he had been complaining about for days now. But other than that, he seemed to be doing okay-ish. 

Last night had been rather difficult though. There was hardly any chance of sleep, as Jimin literally coughed his lungs out. 

"As long as he's breathing properly, there is nothing the hospital can do," Sookie told me on one of our daily calls. "We're so overcrowded, we have people on cots in the corridor. They sent my mum home yesterday, simply because they needed the bed for a person at higher risk."

Sookie wasn't working at MOTS house these days, but got sent to General Hospital to assist the ICU staff who were running on their last legs. And she was my hero. Her hours had risen to seventy a week, but I hadn't heard her complaining once. 

If it were only for myself, I would have told her to stop the long evening calls, and simply fall into bed and rest, but it was reassuring to her hear say that Jimin seemed to be doing well, all things considered. 

"The only thing that really concerns me is that he doesn't seem to be interested in chocolate at all." No chocolate, I had learned, was a massive warning sign. 

"One of the side effects of covid is the loss of taste. It is normal for Jimin not to feel any appetite. He still has the feeding tube, right?"

"Yes, it was supposed to be removed in a week, but I've pushed it back to end of November. It's currently hard to get any hospital appointments."

"That's good. Jimin may be more comfortable with the tube for the time being."

"Sounds good," I bit my lip. "Can I order that liquid food stuff on Amazon?"

"I can get some send to you." There was a small pause. "I can purchase them on a discount but I'll have to ask you to pay me back. I mean… I know things are bad for you at the moment, so don't worry about it right now. But if you could perhaps wire the money through next month after you started your new job and everything…just because I will have to dig into my savings for this."

"Of course! I… I pay you right now." I had approximately five-thousand won next to my name that were somehow supposed to last me until end of November. 

"Don't be an idiot," Sookie said. "And let me know if you need anything else."

"I will." I won't. You have enough on your plate as it is. 

"Soo-soo?" Jimin squinted. 

"Hi Jiminie," Sookie yelled towards Jimin, who tried to smile and wave. 

Thanks to modern technology such as Joon's iPad, I was at least able to keep up with the rest of the world via video call. Although at the moment it was hard to tell who looked worse: the overworked nurse, the covid patient, or the lazy bum who hadn't brushed his hair or shaved his beard in days. It's not like I had a massive growth, but it was just enough to look like I had glued pubes to my chin. 

"I sick." Jimin noted. "Need me'cine."

"Do you give him anything?"

I shrugged. "Just the usual: Paracetamol, a vapour rub, lots of tea with honey. I haven't heard of any other miracle magic cure."

"What's his temperature?"

"Two-hundred and twenty-five million thousand degrees," Jimin wailed. 

"Thirty-nine point eight this morning," I added. 

"Sixty billion millions sounds better." 

"I agree," Sookie told Jimin, "but you sound like you're doing quite well. I'll have an antibiotic prescribed for you. That will help bringing down your temperature."

"Do you get a discount on that too?" I flushed to the colour of an over-ripe tomato at the question, but I was a broke fucker, okay? 

"Don't worry about it," Sookie said and smiled. "Ever since the pandemic started I've been stocking up on those things." 

I grinned. That was my girl.

"How are you doing, Yoongs?"

I shrugged. "Same as always. I don't think I got it."

"That's good to hear. I'm glad."

I contemplated for a moment. "Why do you think this is? I mean, why is Jimin affected so much worse than I?"

Sookie sighed. "Hard to say. We don't always know why some people are affected harder than others. What about your family history? Are there any known illnesses? Heart conditions? Lung conditions?"

I glanced towards Jimin, who had fallen back asleep and snoring. "I can't be sure," I admitted. 

"What about you guys' parents? When we did the admission to MOTS house you mentioned your mother being in the risk group?"

"Jimin's mother," I corrected. "She apparently had breast cancer two years ago. I was adopted."

"And you never enquired about your biological family?"

I did. And I was told that my brother and I had been left on the orphanage's doorstep in the middle of the night. For years, I tried to trace down this so-called family of mine, but he seemed to have gone from care home to care home and then simply vanished from the face of the earth. "Nah, never looked into this. And I don't want to. Topic closed. I would be grateful if this wasn't brought up again." 

"Of course, I didn't meant to snoop, I was just…"

"Enquiring about my medical history, I know." I guess I would be nice to know about those things. But thinking about how my eight-month-old self was abandoned at a doorstep hurt. Hurt more than what my adoptive parents could have ever done to me. I knew those people, I knew their expectations of me. And our rift was because I had no interest in fulfilling those. But what the fuck could my eight-month-old self have done wrong?

But whatever the fuck the universe had been thinking on this day, it had given me Jimin as my little brother. And I guess this was the one thing Karma had done right in my life. 

"You still there, Yoongi?" Sookie laughed. "You seemed to be lost on thought for a moment there. Tell you what. Let's have a movie night tonight."

"Movie night? But you didn't want to come over?"

"I can't but thanks to various streaming appliances, we can have a virtual movie night together. We both have snacks, drinks, find something cute to watch, and spend an evening together that way." 

"I think that's what Shop-dude and his girlfriend have been doing."

"Who?"

"A friend of mine."

Sookie was squealing with laughter. "You call your friend Shop-dude? Why?"

I shrugged. "He works in a shop."

"That's it?"

"He has a hard-to-remember name."

"A foreign name?"

"No, why?"

More giggles. "So he has a regular, Korean, three-syllable kind of name?"

"Umm…I guess so?"

"And you can't remember it?"

"It's three complicated syllables."

"Just what do you call me when I'm not around? Nurse-chick?"

"Now, that's an idea." I grinned. 

"Don't you dare!" Sookie tried to sound threatening but failed utterly. The two dimples on her right cheek showed. 

"He saying Dimples-cutie," came a hoarse voice to my right. 

"Jimin, you utter traitor!" I complained, while Sookie burst out laughing. "You call me what?"

"Your dimples are cute," I admitted with flaming cheeks, fearing my head might explode any moment. 

"That's very sweet of you to say." Sookie blushed just as hard as I did. "I…I used to get teased in school for my dimples. I was thinking of having them surgically removed."

"I'm glad you didn't. I'm not a fan of surgery…." I trailed off, contemplated for a moment. "I mean…I never really thought about it, but after this year, the amount of times I was in hospital because of Jimin's operations and all…I fail to understand how some people undergo procedures willingly? Where is the point? You're healthy. You should be out and enjoy life, rather than sitting in a hospital cot with a stitched-up face."

"I agree now. But growing up, I never felt like I was good enough. I've always been too short, and too chubby, and too round-faced, with dimples that looked like craters. And after a while, I started to believe all of it."

"I…I don't mind any of it. I mean… Umm.." I scratched my head. This was probably coming out all wrong. "What I'm trying to say is that I like you because you're you, you know. And I love your dimples. And I don't care if your tiny or big or in-between. Frankly, I don't understand why those things would matter to anyone. I think you're cool."

Sookie looked at me with an odd expression on her face that I couldn't read. 

"Shit, I fucked this up, haven't I?"

"No, Yoongi, you haven't. I'm happy. It means a lot to hear I'm valued just the way I am. And…" She trailed off and hid from the screen so I could only see some black strands of hair and a small part of her forehead. "…um, what I'm trying to say is that…I think you're cool, too…just like you are. Potty mouth, and financial issues and all." The part of forehead that was visible a moment ago had now fully disappeared and all I could see was a purple-coloured wallpaper background, "I'm so glad I met you, Yoongi." 

The last word came out in a slight whisper. And there was a clot in my throat. But for some reason, it didn't feel…uncomfortable. Quite the opposite actually. "Me too," I mumbled. 

Sookie's face returned to the monitor. She was still blushing, but the widest grin was spread all over her face. And I couldn't help it—I was grinning, too. 

"I, too," came a sleepy voice from next to me. 

"You what, Jimin?" I asked. 

"I'm very glad, too." Jimin muttered, eyes closed and still drooling,"I love you hyungie and Soo-Soo." 

When I looked back into the monitor, Sookie gifted me with a shy smile. Whatever it was between us was still very fresh, but deep down I knew this was going to be something good. 

*

The next day, Jimin felt worse. His fever had risen to above forty degrees, and he was barely coherent for most of the day. His breathing sounded rattled and it seemed to cost him all remaining energy. I was glad that the feeding tube food and antibiotics had arrived last night, thanks to Sookie's interference, so I could make Jimin as comfortable as possible. 

On the other hand, I received some news that had my blood boil to never-been-there-before levels. Joon seemed to have a day off and was apparently bored in his hotel room. This was the fifth message he sent me that day, and I contemplated whether I'd actually really wanted to open another attempt at non-existent police humour. 

In hindsight, I was glad I did. Because the message he sent me didn't include any supposed to be hilarious pictures but a newspaper statement and the comment. On the phone to the chief of police as I type, underneath it.

NEW VARIANT COVID BREAKOUT IN LOCAL PRISON read the headline.  

"Fucking son of a Pitbull and a toad," I shouted, earning me a weird glance from the couple that was passing by the house. I opened the rubbish bin and dropped my waste. I wasn't sure whether they had really heard what I said, or whether they were simply less than impressed by my non-existent recycling skills, and I didn't care. I dialled Joon's number. Either this fucker got this sorted today, or I would go full Terminator on four fucking sorry little policemen arses. 

"Those policemen are responsible for my brother being sick right now," I barked into Joon's mailbox, because of course the fucker didn't pick up the call. Fucking Joon.

The reply came two hours later. You're looking at the wrong headline, hyung

What the actual f…? 

BUSAN LOCAL FOUND DEAD IN DOCKLANDS DUMPSTER. Underneath the headline was a black and white picture of a rather familiar-looking face. My own.



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