Menitos Farm Depot posted: " The above is from a youth, estimated to be over 20. The Twitter thread has a lot more savage comments from people from teenagers to youths in their 40s. This is indicative of the fact that most children would avoid their parents if the could. The onl"
The above is from a youth, estimated to be over 20. The Twitter thread has a lot more savage comments from people from teenagers to youths in their 40s. This is indicative of the fact that most children would avoid their parents if the could. The only reason most children are civil to their parents is the culture. If you remove the culture, very few parents would have access to their children once the children become independent.
Unfortunately, instead of parents to be introspective and try to understand why, they only become more suffocating with innuendos, questions and sometimes outright insults. They proceed to publicise the child as a devil's spawn. They do not observe that the children thrive better without them. They do not observe the despair they put the child through. Looking forlorn is the only way some are used to swing children who are popular in their career and academic circle as intellectuals and support pillars.
You see, decent communicating is not an African thing. The adult child relationship is often enforced to the point of been abusive. A relationship defined by slaps, yelling and undermining confidence. It's almost as if the adult's confidence is defined by their ability to undermine a child's confidence.
This same adults would insist of inspecting their house because they are expecting a guest, cooking special meals because teacher or pastor is coming, wear Sunday best to go visit their classmates. Yet they can't understand why the child wants to have friends over, or why the child needs to hang out once in a while. They can't understand why the child doesn't want to engage with an individual who would hit them for asking questions or yell at them for making mistakes
It's the way your parents did it and honestly, it contributed to your social deficiencies as an adult so why replicate it in your child. Stand with your child, stand for your child. Be the parent that says, I don't mind, it doesn't change who you are, we don't have to tell, speak with your mouth not your hands. Discuss dating, sex, movies, games, brands, and stars.
And when you are a grandma or grandpa, you won't have to be groping for a piece of your child's heart because you guys need to discuss the next big thing in yours worlds anyway
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