Hi read,
It's the holiday season and the end of 2023 is approaching! I absolutely love the holidays, but it's also a time when I start thinking about the year gone by and the year to come.
Lately I've started noticing that...I'm anxious. Here are a few examples:
I didn't get professional phoots taken of the kids this year so what will I put on the holiday card?
It's icy and what if I slip and break my wrist running the dark?
My kid is going to college in 6 years (ish) and are we doing enough together?
It's silly. But it's not.
I've been working on some things to reign in the anxiety, and let's just say...it's a process. As I've thought about this more and done some research, I've learned that humans hate uncertainty. And I feel like our current times eliminate so much uncertainty.
When I was in college I used to look at a map to vaguely understand the location of a place I was trying to go and then drive around a strange city until I found the book store or whatever. Now? I literally navigate to my house.
As a kid, I remember waiting for my favorite songs to come on the radio so I could record them on a tape. I used to listen to my parents' records and finding the song I wanted was always a bit uncertain. Now? Any song, any time. I can even enter a few lines of a song that is stuck in my head and immediately get the title.
And you know that feeling where you're watching a movie and you recognize one of the cast members and are trying to remember where you know them from? I actually force myself NOT to look it up because I think it's important brain exercise to search the long term memory banks.
Anyway, my point is - life is a lot less uncertain today than it was even 30 years ago. I think that's made us MORE anxious about the things that are inherently uncertain. Every day I send my children off to school on their bikes or scooters. They're traveling 3/4 of a mile max but every day I think about all of the ice/other drivers/slippery leaves/curbs/etc that exist between here and there.
Life is an exercise in ceding control. More and more, I found myself thinking about the serenity prayer:
Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
It's a simple statement but it's hard.
Now, you're probably wondering...where the heck did that come from? I signed up for planning, productivity, or parenting content.
In parallel with my anxiety management and life reflection, I have also done a MASSIVE overhaul of my planning and productivity approach. I re-read the productivity classic Getting Things Done, I've been listening to a lot of Cal Newport podcasts, and have been doing my very best to document literally everything that I need to do.
It's hugely improved my mental state. But you know what? You can't plan everything. And that's when you need to have the wisdom to know where your sphere of influence ends and where you have to stop trying to plan the inherently unplannable.
If this resonates with you, hit reply and let me know. This is the first time I've really dived deep personally on this topic and I hope it helps you.
Later this week, I will return to normal programming a give a full overview of the planning method I'm using right now. It's allowed me to start a new job, navigate holiday craziness and make space for my own introspection. And it involves all sorts of fun tools like Google Tasks, Microsoft To-Do, and Trello. Talk again soon!
All the best,
Beth
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