Across over five and a half decades of marriage, the General has planned menus, made grocery lists and mostly prepared our meals. The only couple of exceptions have been when we needed to use the outdoor cast aluminum grill or when guacamole was on the menu.
When I was a kid growing up, my mother would never have entertained guacamole with a meal. She steered clear of "foreign foods." She didn't eat Mexican food, and she didn't eat Italian food. Consequently, Her's was an all-American cuisine. We were meat and potato kinds of people kinds of people who loved cream gravy and fried foods.
My Aunt Maxine lived three doors down and her homemade guacamole was always a welcomed treat. In thinking back, I'm sure my recipe for guacamole was a hand-me-down from her. In addition to salt, pepper, powered garlic and lime juice, a little mayonnaise helped provide the perfect texture.
Let me back up and make it clear that I've always been the person in our family who made guacamole. I'm talking about going all the way back to early childhood for both of my kids going forward. From the years that my kids were little kids until the last decade or so , I've prepared the guacamole.
Seriously, how could anyone entertain thoughts of beef and chicken fajitas without guacamole? If left to my discretion, I would have eliminated the chicken, but what do I know? That is a rhetorical question. I don't expect an answer. My mother always said, "If you cannot say something nice, say nothing at all."
About ten or fifteen years ago, we were having company over for dinner and the General suggested a change to my guacamole recipe. For starters, I know enough about preparing guacamole to know that the formula for success is 100% dependent on the avocados and whether they are perfectly ripe.
What I didn't see coming, felt like a cup of cold water thrown in my face. The General, stated matter-of-factly: "It would work best if you didn't add mayonnaise to the guacamole. Most people don't like that". I was stunned! She went on to add: "If you think you need to add anything, I've got some Greek Yogurt. You can use that."
I am not often speechless, but I was blindsided by the suggested alteration to "my signature series guacamole". What did she mean by, "Most people don't like that?" Worse yet, offering "Greek Yogurt" as an alternative was not something I would have ever considered.. I've never heard of European guacamole. This was going to be a disaster.
The General then thoughtfully added: "I don't think that Andrea and Kevin will eat any, but if Andrea were making it, she'd use the Greek Yogurt." I won't say that I didn't personalize it, because I did. But I'm a survivor and I thought: "I'll show you. I'll do it your way. When no one eats it, then I'll graciously say: "The chef was instructed by management to change the recipe."
The very thought was a burr in my saddle. Who ever heard of European guacamole? Guacamole is supposed to go with Mexican food, not some kind of European cuisine. When this didn't play out well, I was accepting no responsibility. I guess my spiritual gift is pouting. Like I said: "Throw a cup of cold water in my face," and I'll pout.
This wasn't just an old family recipe for guacamole, it was my recipe for guacamole. It was being altered because "not many people liked it", now that really hurt. Just for good measure (though I'm not generally passive aggressive), I used four times as much Greek yogurt in the guacamole as the amount of mayonnaise I would have used.
Like I said earlier, when it comes to guacamole, success is 100% dependent on the avocadoes and whether they are exactly ripe. As it turned out, the avocadoes were perfect and so was the European guacamole. I would say that most people probably couldn't tell the difference unless they were the persnickety folks who didn't like mayonnaise. I guess I learned a lesson. When the avocadoes are ripe, you can't mess them up. The fajitas were good as well, but I'm not bragging.
All My Best!
Don
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