Thursday, July 21, 2022

[New post] What matters most

What matters most

walnutshademom

Jul 21

Katie drove to Walnut Shade five times in 2021; three times during our unforgettably precious Summer of Sngs, once at Thanksgiving, and again at Christmas. She also came in May of this year for Andrew's graduation(!!!) and her birthday. That made six trips in a 12-month period, and then a couple weeks ago she offered to come again. Through tears I said, "Yes. Please come."

The first half of July 2022 has been emotionally tough for me. For one thing, my mom's health has been declining, and facing that fact and talking with our family about it has been sad. For another thing, Andrew would be moving out -- as in, pretty much emptying his room and not living here any more -- on July 13th. He's moving to Baton Rouge, LA to attend grad school at LSU [Geaux Tigers!] and he and I both knew this would involve some major mother-and-son tears. Sigh. I'm usually thankful to have some solitude to recharge my introverted battery, but knowing I'd stand alone to moff him on the driveway and hear his signature three honks for the last time for a LONG time, and then walk back into an empty house alone; well, that's why I said, "Yes. Please come," when Katie offered.

But backing up... On one of her visits here last year, Katie was doing a paint-by-number of Maroon Bells, a well-known mountain scene in Colorado. I watched her work on it and was amazed by how all those little sections of color created such a stunning result. Then at some point (I'm not sure when) she got the idea to do a paint-by-number of Mom and Dad's house and make it her gift to them. So she asked Andrew, our family's best photographer, to take a picture of their house when we were there at (I think) Thanksgiving. Which he did. She ordered the kit and began gradually working on it.

Katie hadn't felt a rush to complete that painting, and that was good because she's had a lot going on this year, what with a job change and a lot of travel. But when she agreed to come here for a week, she said she also wanted the two of us to go see Grandma and Grandpa -- it would be both a special visit with them and hopefully a good diversion for us me the day after Andrew's departure. So she brought along her 1/4 completed "Grandma and Grandpa's House" paint-by-number, planning to finish it and give it to them when we went.

Well, I can tell you that Katie painted like crazy every possible moment here at our house.

Everything was going well and she was rocking along like a champ until she hit a serious snag. She opened #9 of the 24 tiny tubs of paint, only to find that it was dried out and unusable. Oh no! Now what? How would she finish the project?!? Googling something like "my acrylic paint has dried up," we learned that stirring in a few drops of water might solve the problem, so Katie skipped that color for the time being and painted with a different color while I dripped and dropped and stirred. Unfortunately, the resulting product was too thin and too lumpy. It wouldn't work. Not only that, five more of the tiny paint tubs also turned out to be dry and/or rubbery. Sigh.

Since neither of us knew anything about paint, we really needed advice - and right away - from someone who did know something. Katie wanted to get a frame for the finished product, so she thought we should go to a craft store. Andrew came with us, and he turned out to be the best resource. As an R.A. at MSU, he had painted lots and lots of hall decorations, and he was experienced at matching acrylic paint colors.

It turned out that Hobby Lobby didn't have the frame Katie needed -- so she ordered one from Amazon that would be delivered to Grandma and Grandpa the following Tuesday -- but they did have hundreds of small bottles of acrylic paints. Andrew the Analyst quickly went to work, comparing and picking out the ones he thought could be combined to match each of the dried-up colors she needed, and back at home, the Artist kept painting while the Analyst carefully mixed drop by drop and created six tiny tubs of new paint that perfectly matched the originals! Wow!

**Master mixer at work - July 11, 2022**

That was Monday evening, and after we all enjoyed a celebratory "last supper" together at Chili's, Katie painted late into the night. The next day she and Andrew helped me stock and organize our camper (in preparation for our upcoming "Great Adventure" anniversary trip), but other than those few hours, Katie painted all day Tuesday and on into Tuesday night.

Wednesday morning Andrew left. It was bittersweet, as we are SO proud of him and love him SO much. And there were tears.

Afterwards, Katie painted. We'd be leaving for Grandma and Grandpa's house in just 24 hours. Due to a wedding we'd be attending on Saturday, we'd have to go on Thursday and come home late Friday. Could she possibly get it done in time?

By Thursday morning the painting was a little over halfway done, and I loaded the Jeep while Katie painted. The night before she had me asked if I thought she could paint during our drive, but that was an absolutely crazy idea. How could she possibly paint in a moving vehicle? And especially on Highway 65, which is very hilly and very curvy. I was feeling discouraged on her behalf.

But then I noticed the tray table by the front door. I use it when I color-by-number on the porch, and I had a wild thought. Maybe it was possible to paint in the car. I shoved the passenger seat all the way forward and set the tray table behind it. With some pillows propped behind her, maybe Katie could sit in the back seat and paint while I drove. She agreed it was worth a try.

With a cup of brush-washing water in the door pocket and a roll of paper towels on the seat beside her, we got Katie set up back there. We hoped (against hope?) that the road would be smooth enough for her to somehow paint a little bit -- at least from Walnut Shade to Harrison where 65 is a relatively straight four-lane highway. True, that stretch is only about 40 minutes long, but it would be a start.

(Note that since I won't turn around to take pictures while driving, we staged these car shots after the fact, but they are totally accurate.)

I pulled out of the driveway and immediately focused on driving as smoothly as possible. Once we were up on 65, Katie started painting and she quickly made two requests. First, could I open the sunroof to give her better lighting? YES!

**Natural overhead light was really helpful**

And second, could I please tell her when we were about to go over a bridge? YES!

Although I don't normally think about it, it seems bridges do often involve sudden unexpected bumps (one before and one after). So, in the same way that a lecturer begins and ends a quotation by saying, "quote" and "unquote," I called out, "bridge" and "unbridge" dozens of times as we traveled. That way, my artistic passenger didn't have to look up from her work.

Other than one three-minute bathroom break at Ferguson's and our not-so-stellar lunch at Western Sizzlin in Clinton, Katie kept her head down and painted in the car for just over Four. Solid. Hours. while we drove to North Little Rock. Absolutely unbelievable.

When we arrived, the painting was 3/4 done. Katie had wanted so desperately to surprise them with the finished, framed painting, but that simply was not going to happen. She decided to show it to them in its incomplete state, and then hopefully set up their card table and finish painting it during the 24 hours we'd be with them.

She brought it in and they were very impressed.

Mom was especially touched by the fact that Katie would make such a special gift for them.

**Katie kept painting... and painting... and painting**

**And there was joy because they're both so special to each other**

**Progress was definitely being made, but *all* that white on the driveway...?**

After lots and lots and lots of hard work and an hour or so of fastidious touch-up, at 5:00 PM on Friday, July 15, 2022, Katie FINISHED her wonderful paint-by-number painting and presented it to Grandma and Grandpa! And there was great rejoicing!

We left at 5:30 (I wanted to get through Harrison before dark), and on Sunday, Grandpa sent Katie this email:

"The frame arrived today (Sunday). It is in perfect condition and should go very well with the fine art work. I'll try to get everything mounted tomorrow and send some pictures.

Much love,

Grandma and Grandpa"

And on Monday, he sent her another email:

"Here are a couple pictures of your excellent art work, framed and hung where the "blue" picture was. This may not be the permanent home, but it really looks nice. Thank you so much for this wonderful gift. We are truly blessed.

Much love.

Grandma and Grandpa"

Katie replied to him:

"I love it! This makes me so happy. I'm so glad it's special to you and Grandma.

Much love,

Katie"

Afterwards, Katie told me that although she had really wanted to walk into Grandma and Grandpa's house and give them her completed painting, in hindsight she thought it was actually better that it wasn't finished when she arrived. They got to watch her work on it and see what all was involved, and that ended up making her gift even more special to them. It was truly one of the greatest labors of love I have ever been privileged to witness.

In our family group chat, Katie summarized well this whole precious gift-giving experience:

"I finished the painting for Grandma and Grandpa! This is one of the things I've done in my life that I'm proudest of. It was really meaningful to them. "