This is, really, uh…SARCASTIC, if I may say so myself…
First time…
Introductions:
Meet the "father" of my "child", where did we meet? Hmmmmmmmmmmm, would you like me to tell it, or, would YOU like to tell that "tale"???
Okay, fine, I will then…
Well, it all started, back when I was, closing in on my, mid-thirties, and, every late night, I'd heard this, ticking sound, that drives me CRAZY, keeping me up all through the, night. I look around my boudoir (that's "turtle room" for those of you who are interested in knowing…), and can't find the source!
Then, after, I'd, exhausted ALL my options (uh, as if I had those???), I'd, fallen asleep, and start to, dream….
In these dreams of mine, the Time Clock Fairy had delivered the message: you ain't NO spring chicken, "hon", it's now or NEVER, last call on the REPRODUCTION T-R-A-I-N….
Then, I woke up, in cold sweat, can't shake the dream's contents of, and, it'd (the content of that dream) plagued me, through the day, and I can't even focus at work, keep on, spacing out, and a few more days passed, then came the weekend…
and this would be, how I'm, more than likely to explain to my BABY GIRL: H-O-W she was, "made"...
"see that nice lady, she's making sure, that you, INCUBATE, correctly"...photo from online
I'd, finally, made a, MAJOR decision of my life here (woo-hoo!!!), I'd decided to, "crank" one out!
So, I went about, searching, for that MAN, but, looked all 'round town, and all I could find were, TOADS, OGRES, and them knights whose armors are, way too rusted…
What do I do, I'm at my wit's end here, then, I'd walked down into the woods (yeah, it's always like that, 'k???), then, met that magical bear, who'd, pointed me, to the right direction to get KNOCKED up!
So the next day, I found myself, searching through the yellow pages, for that, CERTIFIED, SPERM BANK, and after a few more tries, hits and misses (a whole lot of misses than the hits!)
I finally got one!
That's how this "baby" is now, inside of its (I really don't have a need to find out about the sex, 'cuz I'd much rather that "it" be a total, SURPRISE, so, NO cake cutting from that, FERTILITY clinic here!)
As for that "father" of my "child", I'd only, selected him out of the "bundle" (What I was BLINDFOLDED as I threw that D-A-R-T!!!)………
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