Until I get to, take you, home again, there's nothing I would love more, but, that's, NOT possible now, with you, deteriorating by the day, and I, working 'round the clock, making what measly money I'm able to…
Until I get to, take you, home again, it's for the best, that's, what they all say, don't tire yourself out, they'd told me, but, with each and every possible place I'd gone to visit, I'd felt, grimmer, grimmer, grimmer, by the day, with you, losing your mind, little, by little, every single day.
as dementia progresses, this is, how it'll, end, with the elderly person, bedridden, for her/his, remaining, days...photo from online
There will come a time, when I will, no longer be able to care for you on my own, that I needed to, place you somewhere, where there are the, professionals looking after you, I know it would be what's best for both of us, but I couldn't, let you go.
Until I can, take you home, again, I visit you every day after work, during my lunch break, stayed close to you, sit when you napped, holding your hand, talking to you (but don't know if you can hear, or even IF you could, understand…). Until I can, take you home, again, that's too fetch a dream now, you're NOT going to get better, and I'm, completely, ill-equipped to, take care of you by myself, even WITH, an extra set of hands that I needed, in helping me take care of you.
So, I made the, decision, rationally, I'd known, that this was, what's, best for us both, but, emotionally, I still, can't quite, get over the FACT, that it'd felt like, I was, betraying you, leaving you, in this, facility………….
Until I can, take you home, again, that'll, NEVER come, as you are now, hooked up, on that, ventilator, 24/7, as you'd, forgotten, how to, breathe on your, own…………
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