How do you, teach a young child about loss, about, death, to help them, grieve for the loss of a, best friend??? On the lessons of life and death, translated…
As We Were Feeling Sad that the Young Life is Lost, How Would My Six-Year-Old Young Grandson, Face with Losing His, Best Friend……………
After my eldest grandson came home from school, he kept stating, "after I tell grandpa a story, I will be, filling up the balloons". I'd agreed in no time, and waited until he'd finished reading to me, his dad said, it was getting late and they should head home, he'd become, angry, felt that the adults didn't keep their promises, stressed that he will, fill up the balloons before he heads home.
I couldn't understand why he was so stubborn about filling the ballons, I'd picked him up and asked, "it's really late, mom's waiting for you at home, can't you fill up the balloons tomorrow?", suddenly, he got teary eyed, "Yu is gone, I want to give him his, favorite, balloon………", I'd originally thought he was joking, and I'd, confirmed it with him repeatedly, to see if he was telling me the truth, he'd cried and started, "I'm not lying, grandma…….he really, went to, heaven to be an, angel……….", suddenly, I'd felt my heart wrenching, while I'd felt bad for the young life that's, lost, but how will my six-year-old young grandson, cope with his best friend's, death? All I could do, is quietly, sat with him, to fill up the white, long, balloons, he said, "I didn't get to write any words of blessing to Yu, I will have the teacher teach me to tomorrow then."
illustration from UDN.com
As my eldest grandson left for home, my husband and I decided, to NEVER mention this again, hoping, that it'll help him, slowly forget this, sad memory. These two best friends were deeply connected, back when they were in the two-year-classes together, because Yu with the eye conditions couldn't quite express himself in whole sentences, the teacher assigned my outgoing, active eldest grandson to be his buddy, they were seated next to each other in class, and slowly, they'd turned into, the best of friends. When my eldest was at home, he'd told us about the progresses that Yu had made, for instance: he's speaking now, in more complete sentences, he can count from one to ten now, the two built the castles out of blocks, drawn, and other leisure activities together. In the three years of time shared, any project my eldest grandson had made in my home, he'd told, "I shall give this to Yu tomorrow". Yu was also, very popular in the class, this childish friendship, surely, was, precious, and yet, right after the New Year's, it all came to, a dead, halt.
We'd originally thought, that not talking about death was the best way to help our eldest grandson, but as I saw on the assignment books, the teacher left a two-page note that moved me—the instructor specially selected an illustrated book about death, "The Dinosaur went to Heaven", to teach the young children about death, and she'd described how on the day as the students went to the funeral, and placed the gifts for the child who was lost; as they went to see the child off, the instructor can no longer, hold back her tears, my eldest grandson was really gentle, consoled with her, and inquired, "Does cremation hurt?", the teacher told, "Yu is no longer hurting, because he'd received all of your, blessings, he'd gone to heaven, to be, an angel now." In the classroom, the class set a special corner to commemorate Yu, with his favorite story, "The Cars Built a House".
here's one...image from online
We're really grateful toward how the instructor had handled this matter so delicately, to educate the young children on the first lessons of death, to help them find an alternative way to grieve that's different from the adults' ways. That day, Yu happily chimed to me on his life story, "long, long ago, I was, one of the happy angels in heaven too, I'd loved turning the clouds into cotton candy, and, eaten them slowly, they're so very, sweet. One day, I saw a really, tall building, and I was, so happy I'd spread my wings, soared to the tenth floor window, as the moonlight lit up the skies, I'd, opened the window gently, had, secretly, hidden myself inside mommy's tummy, that's how I became………"
On the day life ended, it's a new beginning for a brand new, journey, I pray, that Yu, in a beautiful heaven, can soar happy and free, like a bird, to find a home that he loved living in.
And so, this is, a lesson, learned, much too early for this young child, he'd lost his, best friend, and, being too young, he'd not known how to express his sadness, his sorrows, his loss, but the school teacher's reading the illustrated books about the meanings of death to the class, it'd helped this young boy understand, that his best friend isn't gone, he just, exists in another form to him, as memories.
another book that teaches children about death...from online
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