How it was, fate, that's, caused things in one's life to, happen…even though, we may think we have something to do with it, but we actually, don't…this is due to the sexist beliefs of the olden days…translated…
I had two maternal grandmothers, one was my mother's birthmother, we'd called her, "Grandma in the countryside", the other, her adopted, whom we'd referred to "Grandma in town".
"Grandma in the countryside" was originally born to a hardworking family in a town in Taoyuan, her older brothers and younger brothers grew up to be physicians, or worked in businesses. In that era when men are weighed heavier than women, this good a family, still gave their daughters up, to a farming family as a child bride, with never-ending manual labor, and no chance for schooling.
the fates of young girls in the earlier era...with the SOLE purpose, function of the female being, REPRODUCTIVE!
photo from online
In 1922, "grandma in the countryside" gave birth to her eldest daughter—my mother. The farming families needed the boys to work the fields, believed, that raising daughters is wasting food source, that eventually, they will be someone else's daughters-in-law, so my mother's life, was the exact replica of my maternal grandmother's, shortly afterbirth, she too, became a child bride to another family's son. And, her parents gave her up, but in return, they'd brought home, a baby girl, to my older uncle by two years as a bride in his future, believed, that if you raised your own daughter-in-law from when they were little, they will be, close to you like the daughters will be. It's just, that this girl, my eldest aunt, grew up and was forced to sleep with my uncle, and yet, after a few short years, she'd, run off. While life became, totally, different for my mother ever since.
My mother was a beautiful baby, a single woman in town wanted her, immediately took her home. From before, the women who were divorced, without children would mostly adopt, so they can have someone to care for their elderly years; and my "grandma in town", opened up a teashop close to the temple, and adopted three girls.
My eldest aunt started in her teens, started helping out with the business, later, she'd taken after my adopted grandmother's work, never married. My second aunt also came to my grandmother when she was infantile too, she'd grown up, to become rough and tall, with darker complexion, really not likable, and yet, she'd followed her fate, shouldered up all the manual labor in the home, and when the adults told her to welcome the guests, she'd, defied them, no matter how they'd, tried and beaten her into, submission. In the end, her adoptive mother couldn't deal with it, and married her to a family that lived in the mountains, life was difficult there, and it wasn't until my second aunt's children were grown, went to Taipei to work, that was when her life started, getting, better.
In 1930, the Japanese government set up the public schools here, and, both sexes are allowed entrance, but, with the deeply rooted sexist beliefs, most of the families still, refused to send their daughters to schools. My mother was the intelligent, and cute youngest of the family, she'd gotten a ton of love from her adoptive mother, not only did she not need to lift a finger in the household chores, they'd put her through school.
My mother was always the top of her class, excelled in every single subject, after she'd graduated, she'd still continued learning, worked hard to study. She'd subscribed to the trending Japanese magazines herself, and worked hard, to absorb the endless information she could of this, new world, learned the means of interacting with others, she'd learned to dress herself well too, when she'd walked down the streets, everybody thought she was from a well-rounded, and rich family.
And, maybe, her adoptive mother saw that she was, outstanding, other than putting her through school, she'd also allowed my mother to work in the banks. In 1940, my father works in the Shantou, Guangdong Branch of the Taiwan Bank, at age twenty-seven, twenty-eight, way past marrying age, his family was desperately, searching for a bride for him, he'd told them, that he'd wanted to marry a former coworker in the Taoyuan Branch. As my father proposed abruptly, my mother was, surprised, being avant garde, she'd written a letter to my father, told him to think things through thoroughly. When my mother was still alive, she'd often stated to me, "I'd had a ton of dreams, wanted to get away from my own home, so I'd, agreed, to marry this, familiar, stranger."
the practices of "wrapping the feet", that's now, outdated, because men like to see women walk a certain way...photo from online
After that, my father had smooth way in work, climbed higher and higher in the banks. I saw in the old photographs, my mother dressed fashionably, with her hair tied up in a bun, with the crocodile hide purse in her hand, in her high heels, with the white gloves, and went to a ton of dinner functions, and parties with my father.
The adopted daughters, the sacrificed in silence—my countryside grandma, my run-away older aunt, my single eldest aunt, my laboring second aunt, all were with, different, fates, only my mother was blessed.
So, everything is, all FATE, and seeing how the writer's mother, had been tossed out, because during the times, the baby girls are considered a waste of food, because you will end up, marrying your, daughters, which was why in those times, daughters got, given up for adoptions, and that just showed how shortsighted the culture was, and the woman's family, never got to, rub off of her good fortune, because they'd, tossed her out, like a piece of, TRASH! The families that gave up their daughters for adoption, don't DESERVE these, baby, girls.
