In playful mode today, The Slog makes a parting assessment of the European Union in general, and France in particular. Sixty-four years ago, a frustrated Charles de Gaulle asked rhetorically, "How can anyone hope to rule a nation with 246 cheeses?" This has always been one of the strongest arguments for community capitalism rather than blocist Big Government. France now has 268 cheeses, and the Franco-German Coal Agreement has morphed into the European Bunion. I doubt if old big-nose would've approved.
The Central Committee of EUNATO has, after long deliberation dedicated to every citizen's wellbeing, decided to produce a daily bulletin of NewNormalLingo (NNL) to clarify where bad old dictionaries from the past were going wrong.
Here's today's selection:
Old New
Biased braindeath Reuters Fact-Check
Washington Picnic Insurrection
Hologram POTUS
Kate Bingham, Hypocrite Dame Kate Bingham, Heroine
mRNA bioweapon Covid19 vaccine
Annual Flu Deadly pandemic
The time is 4 pm The time is what we say it is
Mentally weird asshole Philanthropist
Digitalised Global Theft The Great Reset
Blocist fascism Democratic values
Ivermectin Devil's spawn
Dystopia New World Order
Ineffective immunity Breakthrough infection
There will be a mass burning of all dictionaries everywhere this Sunday at 19.15 pm ECT, and the 26th June shall be commemorated for all time as Guy Fakes Night - when all fictions were finally erased in preparation for the Great Reset, following which 2+2 will finally be restored to its historical conclusion of minus €17 trillion.
As well as having 268 cheeses, since 1789 France has achieved the construction of an atheist State in which there are eleven religious holidays every year, and 75.1% of the population are baptised Catholics. Only France could do this, for the simple reason that no other State on the planet has ever come close to this unique level of cognitive dissonance.
The vast majority of French are what we North Englanders call "canny" - ie, streetwise and amusingly cynical. My one time woodman Petit Paul, for example, once said to me, "I don't pay tax Monsieur Ward, it only encourages them". But those who have attained even the lowest level of nuisance authority are beyond compare in their obstructive, lazy arrogance.
Only yesterday, I suffered an example of this at the local post office, where I went to ask how much it would cost to send a small, carefully sealed package to London, and the conversation with an ugly female crab-apple went like this:
Me: I would like to send this to Royaume Uni.
M'enfutiste: It's too small
Me: The present inside is very small.
Menf: Is it letter-mail or package?
Me: You tell me, but I see it as a package.
Menf: But it is neither - it's too small to be a package, and too bulky to be a letter.
Me: So what do you suggest I do?
Menf: How can I tell? You pitch up here speaking bad French and demand I send it to your Great Britain, but since Brexit this is no longer so easy. This is France and you must abide by our rules. Your postal object does not fit any of our rules but this is typical of you English to expect everyone else to fit in with you.
Me: Can you send it by letter mail then?
Menf: I could but it will need to be reconfigured.
Me: How do we configure it then?
Menf: You need to put it inside a special letter package designed for the purchase.
Me: Ok, lets do that.
Her baleful visage covered in pimples and warts manages to roll its eyes, swivel on her chair, take two steps to behind a screen and bring out the package. I redo the London address on the outside, and the business is done. It costs ten euros.
Me: When will it arrive?
Menf: More questions....how should I know? Since Brexit it is impossible to tell.
Now against this, you have to realise that my next port of call was to a local Proxi store that stocks a brand of sliced bread I particularly like - and also I like the young couple who run the store in the knowledge that they cannot afford to shit on their customers. I told the lady what had happened.
"Oh her?" she replied, "Nobody likes her. She's a relic".
The problem is, French fonctionnaires are almost all relics. They're strangling France....but to the last man and woman, they're all EU and Macron fanatics. Go figure.
And so now to the joyous discomfiture of the Teacher's Pet under siege in the Elysée Palace. As if De Gaulle might have been reborn in the National Assembly, one by one all the Opposition leaders have consulted their fellow memberships and given the President a resounding "Non!" to any ideas of alliance.
Displaying their electoral savvy as rarely before, the French electorate sent Macron a very clear message last weekend: "All the other candidates having been zeros, we gave you a second term...but don't let it go to your head".
The mind boggles at what thoughts are going through the diseased heads at Rothschild Bank, in Langley Virginia's CIA headquarters and NATO at the moment. In the meantime, the Boy King is at an impasse. Voter research carried out in the last 72 hours shows that fully 70% blame Macron for the stalemate, and 57% reject Elizabeth Borne as his chosen Prime Minister.
Fascinating in all this is that even the usual media-whore suspects are prepared to accept that Brigitte's pupil has made a mess of it. Brussels mouthpiece Politico headlined that 'Macron faces 5 years of gridlock'. Equally Establishment Euronews opined that the deadlock 'will make France ungovernable'. France
Being a glass half-empty geopolitical pessimist myself, I find it inconceivable that Macca's paymasters are sitting in their hermetically sealed bubble twiddling thumbs. My instinct is that a newly confected "global emergency" of either health or war or climate will be brought into play as the means to an end of yet more totalitarian lockdown. All of which brings me to the eternal problem of internet information availability.
The most notable feedback I've received by far over the last five days is an inexplicable level of online connectivity problems. Here in France, SFR, Orange and Nordnet have all gone AWOL at one time or another, while contacts in Italy, Greece, the UK, California, Australia, Canada and Austria have reported similar problems at a much higher than average level.
It all smacks of tests to see how quickly the populace can be thrown into frightened confusion about whatTF is going on...thus making them even more prone to acceptance of fascist emergency laws signalling the virtue of "protection".
I noticed today that various State mouthpieces have been piling in to rubbish any and all ideas about "mass formation psychosis" as the reason why 7/8ths of the First World electorates go along with unadulterated drivel about how to 'treat' viral infections. Their bold claim at the moment is that Dr Robert Malone "invented the term out of nowhere" in 2021. In the past, Holocaust deniers have similarly claimed that the word Holocaust was invented by Zionists in the 1980s.
Neither of these claims are true. In a 1944 memo at the Foreign Office, British Foreign Secretary Anthony Eden used the term 'Holocaust' several times. And the definitive biographer of the Nazi Fuhrer Alan Bullock refers serially in his book Hitler a Study in Tyranny to the "mass psychosis" that enabled propaganda minister Josef Goebbels to claim "All Jews are Communists".
Here we see clearly revealed the intent of all present-day depopulating lunatics and Davos eugenicists to erase the best ethical highlights of the past as part of their febrile desire to present the future as something to look forward to rather than dread. In reality, they offer the exceptional worst of a mouldering past - selectively dug up to hoodwink a new (often ignorant) generation - as the rationale for Build Back Better. In doing so, they blame everything on nationalism.
In fact, Adolf Hitler again and again referred to his Weltanschauung - World view. His megalomania is the inspiration for Schwab's World Economic Foundation. The medical experiments he sanctioned via Mengele inform and guide the depraved behaviour of the World Health Organisation and its biggest donor, Bill Gates.
Beware of any organisation with 'World' in its name.
You see, however hard one tries in this bummer of a century, it's hard to stay lighthearted about it for long. But one must try from time to time. This was the latest comment from the Boy King:
"I am very confident because I believe in the goodwill of the women and men who are there to represent the nation and therefore I think that things will move forward," he told reporters last night.
You have to hand it to Manny, he has turned saying nothing into something of an art form. It may be impressionist with a touch of Picasso, Dali and even echoes of Lowry's matchstick men at times, but when you take a second look, the canvas is blank. He is 'very' confident, but is getting nowhere; he 'believes' in 'goodwill' that is clearly absent; his opponents 'represent' the nation, whereas he represents the EUNATO-sur-Davos clan; so it's hard to se what 'things' might move forward.
The 'things' moving forward will be the agenda of all those who know the President is isolated, and must offer policy bribes to avoid being a dead (let alone lame) duck until 2027. The one thing moving into fifth reverse gear will be the Macronian Great Reset: it won't be En Marche so much as Merde.
So I thought it might be fun to imagine how the New World Order will ease him out of the way. The options are:
- Leaking stuff about his very odd tax favouritism towards France's Big Pharma player Sanofi over the years
- Judicious MSM banter about what the two French biolabs in Ukraine are up to, and why he played blue funk phone-chase with Putin at one point in the conflict
- Some reigniting of the outrageous but intriguing rumours about his eclectic sexuality in support of French race relations
- Arranging an accident with extreme prejudice
- Blaming his assassination on the military wing of the Republicains, or perhaps even one of Marine LePen's cats.
In the event of death in office, removal, or resignation of a French president, the Senate's president takes over as acting president. The current incumbent is Gérard Larcher, a Republicain with form when it comes to cover-ups: in January 2020, in the wake of a report brought to his attention by the Senate's unit for listening to and receiving victims of harassment, our Gérard chose to ignore it. The Code of Criminal Procedure provides that 'any constituted authority, any public officer or civil servant ,who, in the exercise of his duties, acquires knowledge of a crime or an offence is required to notify the public prosecutor without delay'. Larcher did not do so.
So he might be just the chap that Jacob Rothschild needs right now.
This scurrilous snippet has been thoroughly fact-checked by AFP, Reuters, the New York Times, Eastenders and the Sudoko Brothers and found to be a very good idea.
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