Kausar:
Of all the things that she had heard of the famed wedding night, a night that enjoyed notoriety and mystery due to the many fabled accounts that ran before it, none came true.
All she had, as a token of a milestone that she had achieved in some form, was a diamond bracelet on her right wrist. It glittered as she moved it against the sunshine that filtered through the window.
In the early hours of the morning, Arshad had left to pick up a friend from the airport who couldn't be there for the wedding but had made it to the reception (Valima). She vaguely remembered him saying something about getting some sleep in before it was time for breakfast.
Pain, embarrassment and astonishment were the only feelings that had persisted long after she had gotten over the initial shock of being with a stranger who was also her husband. It was a strange feeling.
Then what about all the stories and novels? She wondered. They all said that this was romantic and passionate. But overall it felt a little practiced for him and a little panicked for me. I didn't feel any romance or love.
She wished she had had better relationships with Saira. Out of the four sisters she was the only one who had been married and knew about sex and what to expect. Ami was too formidable to ask anything. Her friends, even the ones in relationships, were virgins and hadn't made it beyond cursory kissing and urgent groping. Who to ask?
They say porn is bad to watch, she blamed it on watching erotic movies, that probably skewed by sense of reality.
Showers are magical, she felt her body regaining some of its life back. The events of the night before became clearer in her head too.
"Did someone tell you what might happen tonight?" Arshad's voice, quiet and unfamiliar, spoke in her head again.
To his obvious dismay, she had nodded. His face changed many colors. It didn't look like he was happy to know that she had some information in this regard.
"Your mom or sister?" He asked curtly.
She shook her head, becoming rapidly aware of inflicting judgment on herself from him if she provided any other truthful answers.
"I don't know", She gulped, the air around her absorbing his musky scent and suffocating her. "I don't know anything. Nobody told me anything. What are you asking me about?"
His taut features relaxed. Like an animal had surrendered to its hunter. Kausar relaxed too. It wouldn't be okay to be on his bad side.
And so her marriage started. With a lie.
But what else could I have done, she reasoned with herself. He looked so powerful and intimidating. If I hadn't lied, he'd have assumed false things about me. I had to lie for him to believe the truth.
On the upside, it didn't hurt much. She had imagined there'd be a hell of pain and a river of blood. Thankfully, it hurt like a prick when he entered and bled just about as much as it would from a prick too. There weren't any theatrics involved.
Then why do people invent these stories, the cold water ran down the length of her body as she felt new and virginal again, I guess it's to inspire some love for sex so people have it in the hopes of getting better at it and then finally get pregnant. It's all to perpetuate our kind.
"Are you in there?" Someone knocked on the door. She didn't immediately recognize the voice. Besides the three or four sentences that Arshad had spoken the night before, she hadn't heard him much. Then she realized it was him.
"I'm coming", She said quietly and wrapping a towel around herself she stepped out.
He glanced in her direction and smiled,
"You were snoring when I left. Did you even hear where I went to?"
"To pick up your friend?" She thought she had heard him mentioning a friend. She wasn't as asleep as he had supposed.
"Good girl", He grinned, "It's a dear friend of mine, Adeel. We went to school and then college together. Then we were together in business school also. I'll introduce you to him tonight. Are you excited about the Valima? Someone left your outfit here".
He was standing closer to her. She lifted her eyes to look at him and was momentarily mesmerized by how brown his own eyes were. She had never counted on his eyes having so much warmth and color.
He kissed her lightly,
"Did you like the bracelet? It's very expensive".
She nodded.
"Get dressed and come downstairs", He said walking towards the door, "Your family is downstairs waiting for you".
She couldn't care less about her family. There were more important things to deal with. The Valima outfit was a pretty pink and she couldn't remember if she had matching bangles.
"I need to look for my bangles", She said as he was about to exit the room, "I forgot if I packed my pink bangles. Can you wait while I look for them? Because if I don't have them then we need to get them before the event".
His mouth was slightly open like he was surprised but then shrugged his shoulders and relaxed against the wall, his arms crossed, his eyes watching her get busy with her bags in the corner of the room.
"Phew!" She finally found them. "Gosh! If I had forgotten getting matching bangles……let's just say it would have made this entire wedding really crummy".
With that she grabbed a blue outfit from the lone chair in the room, stepped into the bathroom again and shut the door behind her.
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