I've been very inconsistent in blogging and posting for 2024. If I thought 2023 was a terrible year for me, 2024 is showing itself to be even worse.
I've lost my spark - for blogging, for reading, for doing anything that I usually love to do. Majority of it has to do with burnout, not finding the satisfaction in my career that I had in my previous job, the commute, finding a work/life balance as a military couple while trying for a baby and the list goes on and on and on.
I can't find the words to write and it's a struggle to make it past the first line of any blog post. I know I should try harder. I know I should schedule time to sit and write, look at my categories to find inspiration, update my blog, read some posts to jolt me back into it but truth be told sometimes when I reach home from work I do not even have the energy to eat dinner.
No routine seems to be working. My time and energy feels like it's very limited to doing only what is a necessity and blogging is not a necessity.
I've contemplated if it is time to call it quits after four years. I've contemplated if to push through the rut. I've contemplated if to take an extended break until I'm in a better place emotionally. But then I look at my 2024 goals and written in black and white is the following goal: "Publish 8 to 10 blog posts monthly".
If I give up now on this goal, does it mean I'll give up on the others? If I give up now on this goal because it's hard, because it's challenging, because I feel like I can't do it, does it mean I'll give up when I encounter obstacles with my other goals?
There's no right or wrong answer as this is one of the situations where I need to do what I think is best for me. So I'm back to the drawing board to figure out what changes I need to make so that I can maintain my desire and spark for writing. The next few months will be a challenge - that much I know - and while being inconsistent is not ideal, hopefully the inconsistency pushes me to blog regularly.
Thank you for reading and for allowing me to air how I feel. Hopefully this gives me the push in the right direction.
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