Tuesday, November 1, 2022

[New post] YOU GET SO ALONE

YOU GET SO ALONE

Jim Trainer

Nov 1

Met up in Yoga. An align class. Were at Brew&Brew for cortadoes after.
"So how's it been."
"Better Brother X."
"Going to meetings?"
"Eh."
"Yeah?"
"Had a hot date this weekend. Did LOADS of laundry. Hired a cleaning lady!"
"No shit."
"Through an app. Put the job up, said it was 3 hours. 2 hours in, I'm at Little Brother's. Feeding Else. Says she's about done. 'You vacuum?' I ask her. She doesn't answer. Would've grabbed Little Brother's vac—been borrowing it for 3 years but I didn't. Get to my apartment. Said she only booked 2 and her vac burned out. So I go back to Little Brother's. Get his vac. Give Else a rub. Stop at HEB. Get a steak, potatoes, oven cleaner, hot mango, nuts, juice coffee and bubbly. Throw EVERYTHING in the bedroom closet. I'm doing laundry around the clock. She bailed."
"Aw."
"Yeah. So I text this gargantuan bitch. Tall. Been on her for years. We kissed back at the tail end of my drinking. But that's it. She doesn't respond. Text reading-girl. 'Who is this?,' after giving her number to her friend to give me. Ask her out. Takes 9 hours to get back to me. Says she's got a kidney infection."
"What."
"Yeah. Go to bed late. Eat all the chocolate I bought for my date. The steak, potatoes, mushrooms, broccoli. Fall asleep watching this fucking show. Hospital drama. One of the nurses, she's sleeping with the ghost of her former lover. He died of complications from a heart transplant. She's having sex with him in the next room while her boyfriend's there. I guess he's there the ghost, I guess he's there to take her to the other side."
"Lol."
"Yeah."
"So...nothin?"
"Nothin. Do my caregiving shift the next day. 72. Parkinson's. The sweetest. I massage him. Rub him down. He used to be a runner so he's in good shape but way too thin."
"Damn."
"Yeah. Come home and eat the rest of the steak and chocolate. The nurse figures out he's there for her. She's got melanoma. Stage 4."
"Lol."
"Yeah."
We watched the people. In Yoga pants with their dogs and their lives.
"It'll change your life."
"I know."
"I promise."
"I know. I wanna work in recovery so I need to get back. I just couldn't relate."
"There's tons of meetings."
"I know. Need to get in shape. Stop smoking. Get back out on the road. I just. Come back from tour and I feel like a person."
"You love it."
"I do. So I'm watching this show and a thunderstorm rolls in. Hank's at the glass doors and I melt. I'm not lonely. I'm good."
"Hanky boy!"
"HANKY BOY! Neighbor Dan texts me. 'He there?' Best cat in the world. We're Hank's two dads."
"Lol."
"Yeah."